2012, here we come!

Is it bad that my resolutions haven't changed from last year's? Everything I was thinking and feeling at this time last year still applies... with 365 days worth of experience tacked on for proof.

So, along with yet another new blog design, I'm posting my resolutions for 2012, as well as last year's Proviso for a New Year's Revolution. Although the general concepts are the same, I've added updates that apply since I first made these resolutions for 2011!

1. Paint more regularly (it's been rather sporadic since 2008)--and complete the paintings I start.
   2012 update: I took a few classes at the Palette & Chisel studio in 2011, and plan on doing a few more this year -- being in the right environment has a lot to do with keeping the creative juices flowing!
   
2. Exercise more often and attain a healthy weight (what this will be I'm not quite sure... I think I'll know it when I see it).
   2012 update: Our gym membership expired in June 2011.... we just renewed it in November. That means a full 18 months to get back into the swing of things! I'm hoping to do more group classes for Pilates, aerobics, dance, etc.
   
   
3.  *Keep House... better and with a joyful spirit (*This covers a variety of concepts, including but not limited to cooking, cleaning, organizing, decorating and maintaining a general environment of comfort and joy.)
   2012 update: This has become increasingly difficult since the start of my new job in March 2011. I couldn't have guessed how much that would change my schedule back in January 2011, but it does add a new level of challenge to keep up with a housekeeping regimen. I think I'm up to the challenge..... Looks like I won't be going to bed before 11pm this year!
   
   
4. Cook meals that are both healthy and delicious (this includes weekly meal planning to avoid last-minute restaurant meals and as well as consideration of nutritional value)!
   2012 update: This is also a more difficult task with my job hours, but I know there's plenty of women out there who can do it -- so can I!
   
   
5. Pursue contentment, peace and gratitude in any given predicament: job, location and general life situation.
   2012 update: This is an ongoing pursuit in my life... one with its good days and its bad days. 2011 was a pretty 50/50 split as far as feeling contentment. I'm hoping that one day (soon) everything will just snap into place but, in the meantime, I'm willing to keep working at maintaining that balance.
   
   
6. Be more proactive in all of my relationships -- near and far.
   2012 update: I've always known that I was something of a loner. I don't always need company to be happy, but sometimes I really do need someone who gets me and is willing to listen. I realize that's pretty selfish and one-sided -- wanting a relationship that works only when it suits me. So, the update to this goal is to be more giving of myself and willing to make a relationship/friendship work even when I feel like I'm not getting everything I want out of it. A friendship (just like a marriage) takes two people working at it, which can be quite difficult, so my goal for 2012 is to work harder and pursue the relationships that count the most.

So, there you have it. It's somewhat intimidating to see these in print, but I figure if they're written down somewhere that makes them more real and binding. Which means I have to try and complete them. For at least another 12 months! Here we go....

Life without revision will silence our souls....

This is a song called "Snow" by my favorite band, Sleeping at Last. It is from their "December" EP which was part of a year-long collection of EPs (one for each month of the year, containing 3 songs each) called "Yearbook". The video below is a compilation of shots sent in by fans...



Here are the beautiful lyrics... My favorites lines are in bold and these words are floating through my thoughts tonight, on this last day of 2011:


The branches have traded
Their leaves for white sleeves
All warm blooded creatures make ghosts as they breathe
Scarves are wrapped tightly like gifts under trees

Christmas lights tangle in knots annually
All families huddle closely
Betting warmth against the cold
All the bruises seem to surface
Like mud beneath the snow

So we sing carols softly
As sweet as we know
A prayer that our burdens will lift as we go
Like young love still waiting under mistletoe
We'll welcome December with tireless hope

Let our bells keep on ringing
Making angels in the snow
And may the melody disarm us
When the cracks begin to show

Like the petals in our pockets
May we remember who we are
Unconditionally cared for
By those who share our broken hearts

The table is set
And all glasses are full
The pieces go missing
May we still feel whole
We'll build new traditions in place of the old
Cause life without revision will silence our souls

Let the bells keep on ringing
Making angels in the snow
And may the melody surround us
When the cracks begin to show

Like the petals in our pockets
May we remember who we are
Unconditionally cared for
By those who share our broken hearts

As gentle as feathers
The snow piles high
Our world gets rewritten and retraced every time
Like fresh plates and clean slates
Our future is white
New Years resolutions are reset tonight

Daylight Spending Time?

I wrote this post earlier this month (as you might guess from the title, right around the Daylight Savings Time change) but, for whatever reason, didn't post it. The feelings still apply, though, so I'm posting it now! Just some thoughts on the passage of time....

I can't believe how quickly this year has flown by. 2011 is waning fast and there's so much I have yet to accomplish! I've given myself plenty of excuses for not being as productive as I would like.... starting a new job with crazy hours being the most prominent on the list. Nonetheless, I feel like someone's been winding the clock forward since March, like Daylight Savings Time decided to skip ahead several months rather than just an hour. And here we are, falling back an hour again, Thanksgiving is around the corner, then Christmas, then 2012... but I get ahead of myself. Perhaps that is the problem. I feel as though I am always thinking in the future. What's on the docket for tomorrow's work day, or next week or next month? What are our plans for this weekend?? When's our next vacation???

There's certainly nothing wrong with planning ahead. In fact, it's really a very important skill (it can be monumentally important in preventing tardiness, for example). But, it can really mess with your head. We "modern" women tend to think in schedules of "5-year plans" and career paths and biological clocks. When did it all get so complicated? For the past 3 years (or perhaps longer), I have felt like something is always just ahead, something better than what's going on in the present. When, in reality, what's right in front of my nose is really what's most important. Matthew 6:34 comes to mind: "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

We live in a world that seems to be turning faster by the day. Technology spurs an excelerated pace of life and, despite the preponderance of "social media" and persistent digital connection, we communicate and live our lives less genuinely because we are so concerned with the next big thing. It's not the technology that's bad (obviously it enables us to do some pretty incredible things), it's the mindset that goes along with it. The "I'm so worried about where I'm going to be in 6 months or 5 years that I forget how blessed I am to be living in today" mentality. It's a mindset of forgetting the blessings God has given us in this life, the relationships He puts us in and the everyday lessons He gives us the strength to experience. This is the important stuff. The world could end tomorrow, and where does our 5-year plan end up?


So, for today, it's about striking a balance. Planning with enough wisdom to be prepared for what may come, and enough faith that God will always provide and simultaneously living with the knowledge that He already has provided everything we need for this very second down to the last iota.