Keeping Up Appearances

Back in April, a friend and I hosted a women's only, 2-day seminar on the subject of beauty, health and appearances. We were inspired by a webinar from the Botkin sisters called Reclaiming Beauty. The topic never gets old. In our materialistic American culture especially, the vanities of appearance and the idol of beauty are rampant; they have delved their way so deeply into our consciousness that we almost cannot separate what God calls us to be as women and what secular customs have dictated. So where does God's design begin and our call to pursue beauty end?

My friend and I quickly realized as we prepared for this seminar that the subject matter was far greater in depth than we had initially planned for. Especially for women. I'm not dismissing the fact that men are called to care for their health and appearance as well, but it does not seem to affect them emotionally and spiritually in the same way it does the "fairer sex" (this idiom proves my point). Women find value in their appearance in ways intimately tied to their self-worth and cultural value. The way a woman dresses or feels about her appearance will affect her mood, her actions and therefore the way she influences those around her. At the same time, focusing on the way she feels about herself (rather than sacrificing self for the service of others as we are called to do) can lead to a downward spiral of self-pitying egocentricity, narcissism and possibly depression.

The Bible points to the beauty of the female form (Song of Solomon; Psalm 139:14) and the praiseworthy nature of the physical body we are given by God; while simultaneously warning against the dangers of relying on these external features (1 Timothy 2:9-10; 1 Peter 3:3-4). Proverbs 31:30 says "Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised." Clearly the nature of true beauty -- the beauty that is most pleasing to God -- does not come from external adornment or physical features. 1 Timothy 4:8 states: "Physical exercise has some value, but spiritual exercise is much more important, for it promises a reward in both this life and the next." Paul does not deny the value of pursuing physical fitness and health, but reminds us that exercise of the spirit is the more valuable pursuit.

Scripture truly gives us direction as to where are to find our value in this life -- and it is not in our appearance. We are called to pursue excellence, and to work at all things for God's glory (Col. 3:23-24). And the next time I am obsessing over the shape of my body in the mirror or bemoaning a thick thigh or a rounded stomach, I hope I can remember that this physical body does not define my identity as a child of God. It is a gift for which to be grateful, and a tool to be used in His service. He has given me a body to care for as "His temple" (1 Cor. 6:19-20); He has made it "fearfully and wonderfully" (Psalm 139:13) so that I might use it to serve Him.

As a woman, I will probably always be thinking about my sense of style, how I look or what I'm wearing (I don't love watching What Not to Wear for nothing!) It's something I enjoy and I think appreciation of beauty is God-given. The challenge is not valuing this awareness of appearance over my call to serve God with my appearance first. I could draw in several points right now about the modesty debate that always seems to be flying headlines across the blogosphere, but I'll try to keep it to a single point: we are to be responsible for the bodies God has given us in a manner that is pleasing to Him (not the world, not current fashion trends and not a set of rules about skirt length); HOWEVER, Scripture also points us to living a life that proclaims the Gospel in every word and deed. I think that includes how I look. Without saying a word, I want my physical appearance to convey that I am honoring God with my clothing, my make-up, my hair, my jewelry, etc. I don't think it's going to happen every day, but I believe He has given us the tools to make these decisions for His glory. This is not one of those "Christian liberty" topics where I can choose to bare more skin to the world because I am free from the guilt of sin. This freedom from guilt is what enables me to trust that God is working to spread His Truth in ways that I may not even be aware of -- and for me, that means keeping up appearances!

Recommended Reading

Letting Herself Go by Tim Challies
Does Female Beauty Matter? from Girls Gone Wise
Being Skinny is Not a Christian Virtue from Her.meneutics
A Numbers Game: Why Your Weight Shouldn't Matter from The Everygirl
Embracing Beauty by Trina Holden

Christmas in July

December is pretty much on my mind all the time these days. Why, you ask? Well, it's not because I just can't wait for snow and presents and the celebration of Christ's birth (although these are all wonderful things and I am looking forward to them). It's because DH and I are expecting an extra special holiday delivery right around December 4. Yep, we're expecting a bouncing baby boy!

Last Thursday at my 20-week appointment, we found out our little "it" is a "he" and we are thrilled for this new addition to the clan. I can't wait to meet him! As one might imagine, the last few weeks have been full of excitement, announcements, planning and prayer. Being pregnant is pretty nerve-wracking! So many things to be anxious about... especially when I realized that the things to worry about pretty much never stop! Even once the baby is born, there's all kinds of things to mull over: will he get sick? will he grow properly? will he do well in school? will he make friends? will he be successful? The list could go on. Parenting is a big job -- in more ways than one.

But I've also realized that my puny little anxiety is not going to make a smidgen of difference in the grand scheme of things (except as negative impact on myself and those around me). I am learning to trust more and more in God's Providence and His plan for me, my family and my unborn son. God's plan is greater and more perfect than any idealistic life I could dream of for the future. I am grateful that He is using this pregnancy to teach me that, and I foresee parenting as being an even more intense version of this lesson.

Amongst all the pregnancy and newborn care books that are currently littering my nightstand/Kindle, I still haven't been able to put down the writings of my new favorite Grace Livingston Hill. Currently, I'm reading A Daily Rate. The moral of this book has been particularly poignant as I learn to cast my worries at the cross and trust God's faithfulness to His promises. Hill utilizes a somewhat obscure verse in 2 Kings as the backbone of her story:

"Day by day the king gave Jehoiachin a regular allowance as long as he lived." 2 King 25:30

The characters in the story are learning to daily rely on the Lord's provision, rather than worrying for the days, weeks or months ahead. Daily we are called to take up our cross and follow Him. But no more than that. Christ does not ask us to worry for tomorrow when we take on His yoke (Matt. 6:34, Matt. 11:29), but promises that if we seek His will first, He will provide for the rest. 

This is such an important reminder over the next 5 months (and beyond)! If you haven't picked up a copy of anything by Grace Livingston Hill (she's written hundreds of books and every single one I've read has been great), I would encourage you to do so today!

Cherries Galore!

I have really been enjoying cherry season this year and especially with our local farmers market around the corner, we are taking advantage of every organic pound of cherry goodness we can get! DH picked up a big sack of sour cherries last weekend and I decided to make a sauce out of them since they're a little tart to eat plain. It was a simple recipe from my Joy of Cooking cookbook (my favorite right now) and it is delicious over vanilla ice cream!

I took a few photos on my phone (Instagram style) and they're a little blurry, but you get the idea. Looking forward to this "fancy" dessert again tonight!